If you are the father of the groom, you almost get the same attention as the newlyweds. Just like that pressure wasn’t enough for one day, being the person to have his groom’s father speech, you will most likely go under a lot of stress. What you need is a strategy to stay calm and focused, while everything seems to go crazy around you. You will also need to be prepared for dozens of unexpected remarks, situations, things going wrong. Am I pessimistic here? Absolutely not – the reality is that every wedding has its downsides and problems. The real situation and outcome comes from answering this simple question: how am I going to react to those problems when I face them, knowing that I didn’t expect such problems or that the problems are the most annoying in my point of view?
Mostly it’s our reactions to determine success or failure. This applies to every father of the groom speech situation as well. So, to put it out as simple as possible, you must be in total control. Let’s go through the steps of being in total control!
Understanding the complexity of the situation
Yes, you might assume that your wedding speech is your only concern and then you only get to talk to everyone you’d wish. That would be nice indeed, but it’s not how weddings happen. You see, the countless occurrences of things you weren’t expecting can easily change everything. For instance, you might have prepared to be the first person to speak. Then what you do if you are to speak only 2nd or 3rd? What will you think of if anyone speaking before you mentioned half of your ideas? What if you realize that you overheard a conversation (a negative one) criticizing some things that you were just going to talk about?
The real key is calmness and being prepared for it. What if your ideas are told? You can turn things into funny situations and making jokes on how another speaker already mentioned what you have on your heart. Then, you can also make references if it’s the case. More
Fathers are often confused, because there are no clear, step by step manuals and instructions on many aspects of a father of the groom speech. As you continue reading this article, we will present the question and an answer as detailed as possible.
Question: Why are there rules for the groom’s father speeches? Isn’t it enough if I simply speak as I can, as a simple man, without “extra” preparation?
I might begin like “there are rules, because …” and continue with a long sentence, but let me clarify in parts, in details.
Before I can give a complete answer, let me list some of the known and unknown rules:
You must be in good knowledge and respect of wedding speech formalism.
You must not be tired.
You shouldn’t consume any alcohol before speaking.
You must be highly aware of what’s going on (psychologically) and you must not create self-induced states.
Your emotions must be on the positive, controlled side.
Your nerves must be in a calm state.
Your speech must flow in a natural, but professional way.
You must have a perfect body language in all aspects.
You must prove excellence in your behavior before, during and also after your speech.
You must be very respectful with the newlyweds, and with the guests too.
Wow, you might say! Quite some rules, aren’t they?
The above list of rules can already give you an answer to the second part of the question. It is clear and obvious as the sunlight shining through your window that you can’t just have a “simple” speech, because it wouldn’t consider all these rules and thus it would become a lot worse than desired. Also, if anyone notices your lack of preparation, a lot of judgment will be thrown to you, some of it directly and another part indirectly, behind your back.
But what about all these rules? Let’s understand each of them! More
I remember it was the 15th of July, my son Robert and his girlfriend Carmen had been invited over for dinner by my wife Jane. At the dinner table, Robert suddenly tells me, “Dad, Carmen and I have decided to get together. I hope you and mom are okay with it…” No sooner did he finish saying this than the idea of the groom father speech occupying my mind. We had a month’s time and there was so much to prepare. I remember what an amazing speech was given by my father on my wedding day. I was so touched and moved. I started respecting him more than before. The influence that he has over these years has helped me and Jane lead a beautiful and easier life. Although I am a father myself, I still look up to my father for being such a great example in my life.
Robert has always respected me and helped me in every aspect of life. He has successfully and faithfully followed my rules for life. The love and care that he has nurtured in himself for so long has been thanked for on his wedding day. I started off immediately. After the dinner was over, all I could really think of was the father of the groom speech. I had to shower the same good wishes and influence on Robert, which my father showered on me.
Let me tell you how I planned carefully and wrote my very own speech. I remember both Robert and Carmen came up to me and gave me a big hug and all the guests gave me a standing ovation. It took me regular rehearsing of the speech followed by searching alternate websites day in and day out. I even went through a book on how to write father of the groom speech. I remember when Robert was small, he would ask me how God gifted those people who did a lot of good in their life and I answered back that God has in store a special gift for everyone who continued to do good in their life.” Finally, God is giving him the best gift of his life, a lovely bride, Carmen. More
Good afternoon to one and all. For those who don’t know me, I am Neal’s father, Richard. On the behalf of my wife, Jessica and I, I would like to welcome you all and thank you for coming to this very special occasion to celebrate the marriage of my son Neal to Sarah, joining us in this great happiness.
I know about your extensive efforts to travel and reach to this event and you all came from many places, even Seattle, and New York. But the first prize must go to Patricia who has travelled all the way from Argentina. However, you are all here because you have played an important part in the lives of Sarah and Neal for the years, and now you came here to celebrate this happy occasion today.
Today is, of course, a celebration, not just of the love that has united Sarah and Neal in marriage, but also for the people of the families, who molded and influenced the lives of these two special people. So, Jessica and I would like to extend a very warm welcome to Brianna and Jake for bringing such a beautiful daughter to this world and raising her up so well to be such a fine lady. We thank their family and relatives and friends of both families. Thank you all for joining us in celebrating this very special day. More
Wedding is a public occasion and requires the participation of the entire family and friends. Speaking in front of the public is a nerve wrecking task. But it is after all a day for your son. So, your fears are usually overridden with excitement and confidence. Happiness is what justifies through the actions of the wedding occasion. Everything that you do is important on the wedding day. Starting from how you welcome the guests to how you deliver the toast to the couples, everything matters a lot in these wedding occasions. It is a big step towards life and you want to make the best out of it. Indeed at the end of the day, you do worry and care about your son and his happiness.
A father of the groom speech needs not be very formal. It should be appreciable, with added jokes and spices. Garnish you’re the father of the groom wedding speech with past experiences and memories. Lay them with worthy examples and advices. Assure your son that it is a wonderful moment that he has given you to celebrate. And you shall make the best out of it! Usually, the father of the bride speech is boosted with emotion and the groom’s father speech should be, on the other hand, wrapped in rapture and a plethora of jubilation. More
Gathering ideas and inspiration for your father of the groom speech could be quite a task. With several books available in the market, making a choice to pick one can become difficult. However, there are a number of video sources of inspiration available on the World Wide Web too. This article will provide you with few of such content, which are existing online for anyone’s help.
1. Both the book – ‘Wedding toasts made easy’ by Tom Haibeck and his channel on the social video database prove to be excellently rewarding to the user.
The focus of the material by Tom Haibeck is tackling your nervousness about having to make a wedding toast. The material is called the bible of wedding toasts. The training video provides proper guidance to the learner and is an all-inclusive material. While the videos are formulated in such a way, the book has been incorporated with illustrative series of hilarious cartoons, the credit of which shall be carried by the award-winning cartoonist Grahame.
The following links will help you discover more on the training videos & the book:
2. The next link is a single video training material that enlightens on every aspect of how a father of the groom speech must be and must not be.
How to give it a funny yet remarkable start? The father represents the groom’s whole family, so the father of the groom speech holds great importance. Ideas on how, when and what incidents to include are all here. How to make the speech funny and witty rather than emotional? More
Still strikes you, right? The fact that the son whom you brought home from the hospital as just yesterday has now grown so big and handsome, that he walks down the aisle with his bride ready to start his new journey of life. Surprise and awe fills your heart to think of this. The moment your son comes in and tells you “Dad, Jessica and I want to get together.” (Jessica is the bride. The son here talks about the marriage) From that moment onwards you start to think as where you are going to organise the party, what food you shall order, whom shall you invite…
Finally, it strikes to you before going for sleep that time has flown by so fast and you are left with so little time to share privately with your son. You feel that now you son is going to have a special person in his life and is going to share his feelings with her. Then, the thought of the groom’s father speech strikes you. It is now time to dawn on the best father of the groom wedding speech to let your son know how special he is to you and how he has always been and will always be. More