If you are the father of the groom, you almost get the same attention as the newlyweds. Just like that pressure wasn’t enough for one day, being the person to have his groom’s father speech, you will most likely go under a lot of stress. What you need is a strategy to stay calm and focused, while everything seems to go crazy around you. You will also need to be prepared for dozens of unexpected remarks, situations, things going wrong. Am I pessimistic here? Absolutely not – the reality is that every wedding has its downsides and problems. The real situation and outcome comes from answering this simple question: how am I going to react to those problems when I face them, knowing that I didn’t expect such problems or that the problems are the most annoying in my point of view?
Mostly it’s our reactions to determine success or failure. This applies to every father of the groom speech situation as well. So, to put it out as simple as possible, you must be in total control. Let’s go through the steps of being in total control!
Understanding the complexity of the situation
Yes, you might assume that your wedding speech is your only concern and then you only get to talk to everyone you’d wish. That would be nice indeed, but it’s not how weddings happen. You see, the countless occurrences of things you weren’t expecting can easily change everything. For instance, you might have prepared to be the first person to speak. Then what you do if you are to speak only 2nd or 3rd? What will you think of if anyone speaking before you mentioned half of your ideas? What if you realize that you overheard a conversation (a negative one) criticizing some things that you were just going to talk about? Visit this Link For 25 Father of the Groom Speech Examples
The real key is calmness and being prepared for it. What if your ideas are told? You can turn things into funny situations and making jokes on how another speaker already mentioned what you have on your heart. Then, you can also make references if it’s the case.
Then, if you have some unsettled conflicts with anyone, leave them behind. Think of it as this: being your son’s wedding, this day is very important for the fresh couple. What would your family and friends think and what would your son’s friends think if they saw you act grumpy and making rude remarks or giving ugly looks to people? The last thing you’d want is to ruin the atmosphere or to leave people with the totally wrong impressions on your personality and real values.
Another trick with a father of the groom speech is that there will be split opinions and split remarks. Some people will be shy or not too honest with you, thus they will tend to speak behind your back. Others will be braver and more direct, being able to confront you even if they didn’t agree with you. In any case, even if you receive criticism that wasn’t righteously given, you must stay polite and without answering back in an ugly manner. After all, the wisest person is the one that doesn’t speak out of anger.
Obviously, people will keep their eyes on you. It’s either curiosity or being filled with envy and bad intentions. Regardless of the guests’ true initiatives, you must pay a lot of attention to your attitude, to the way you show your feelings and the way you behave no matter what happens.
If you can’t get a hold of yourself under pressure, think about your son. How would he feel, if you said something or acted somehow and people would’ve shown their disrespect? Obviously, under such circumstances, your son would definitely say that there is something wrong and you would make him feel uncomfortable and ashamed. That is something every father wants to avoid. How would’ve you remembered your own wedding if something was made wrong, be it your father or someone else? That’s right: every person deserves a perfect wedding day!
Avoid the dangers of complexity and situations
If you are well-prepared for your father of the groom speech, it’s easy and normal for you to have tremendous success while speaking. However, being prepared goes to many sides and has many faces.
You see, emotions aren’t always controllable. Even if they aren’t easy to be held under total control, it’s easy to learn how to hide your emotions and how to transmit better emotions, even if you feel anxiety, stress or things like that. Such things can be learnt a bit harder, but with time, patience and practice, you will truly be able to master emotions.
Then, there is a matter of selecting your words. If you speak with well-selected words, then it’s a key aspect of the flow of your speech and then you are easily transmitting a message.
If you are looking forward to avoid the commonly mistaken situations in which people get bored after a certain point of the speech, you will make sure to keep the speech short and to the point. While most people say that you could speak up to 10 minutes, it’s half true and half non-sense. That is because, especially at weddings, people won’t really want you to speak more than 4 minutes. That’s right – only 4 minutes of speaking are recommended in an ideal case. However, if you feel that your speech also contains some special elements, you can feel free to speak for 5 minutes.
Considering gestures, such as expressions on your face, the way you look at people, the position of your body and especially the position of your hands, you have a lot of things to learn. This is because people instinctively “speak” with their body language.
Some extra things to consider
You should always think of others at the wedding. You should especially think of your son and his bride. If you can make them feel special then it’s a good start, but it’s even better if you can make all guests feel special.
How can they all feel special? It can be your attitude, your behavior, your simple remarks. Most of the times people need to learn to think simple. So this is what I recommend you: think as simple as possible, regardless of how complicated a situation seems on the surface. If you look at a situation in depths, it can be simplified a lot.
Then, people will remember you in a positive or a negative way. Wouldn’t it help your son and his bride if people remembered you as a positive presence at the wedding? Yes, it would definitely make them feel proud!
You can also check some tips on how to be a cool dad at the wedding. It’s not only about the speech. You see, things like what suit you wear, what topics you discuss are essential. If you are an open-minded person, then these things will be normal and very easy for you to respect. If not, then I recommend that you consider changing your point of view and try looking at the wedding from different angles. Only like that you will be able to discover things you never noticed before.